Dating Pet Peeves

The world of dating is full of pet peeves that really do grind my gears. I've only ever experienced online dating twice in my life, but these lasted for a few months and I came to learn many pet peeves which was really frustrating, so I thought I'd share what my dating pet peeves. Maybe you can even relate to them.

1. Nothing Serious

I don't mean to sound like a dumb ass, but what does it even mean when they're say they don't want anything serious? Most of the time this phrase means just sex and nothing more. Why not just say I just want sex and a bit of fun? That's it then we will all know where we stand. Why do things that make it seem like it's more than that? Why text first? Why buy food for me? Why talk about personal things? I mean I know serious obviously means taking it to a relationship level but why can't we have actual dates when it's not serious? Why not have fun outside the bedroom? Or do you just see a body and nothing more?

2. Honesty

I do not care for the BS and lies, making out like they care when they obviously really do. Why not just be honest? Not being honest only makes things ten times worse. It leads to overthinking and worry. Even more arguments and probably making both parties feel worse. You may as well just be honest and say you're not interested, or you don't want a relationship. This way everyone knows where they stand and whether that brings things to an end or continues on with just a bit of fun then at least you can all move forward. 

3. Messaging

The phrase they don't text me so I'm not going to text them blah blah blah can go away right now when it comes to online dating. If you start thinking with this mentality, then you may as well give up now. It's not worth it. Now there is no right or wrong way to do this. Sometimes being too needy can put people off and sometimes being too distant can also put people off. It's about balance. If you're interested in them then make the effort to message and if they're interested in you then they will message you. Sometimes a bit of an effort goes a long way. Obviously if it gets to a point where you're always messaging first and you start noticing how they don't continue the conversation, leaving you on red then that may be a little sign that things may be coming to end. Sometimes giving someone space to message you first may help you to see things clearly. I read somewhere that if someone is interested in you then they'll put in the effort, if they're not then obviously they only want you for one thing. It's confusing and sometimes can lead to heartbreak but it's also not worth the pain of overthinking why they are not messaging you. People just drift apart and sometimes you just got to accept things are coming to an end then move on. My biggest tip is don't let them know that it's bothering you, the minute they see you're bothered or frustrated means you're playing right into their hands because they know that at the click of the fingers you will come running to them and you do not want to be that person. Sometimes you've got to listen to Elsa's words 'conceal, don't feel.' then just 'let it go'. Honestly, you're worth so much more than a booty call. 

4. Keeping it in the bedroom

At some stage, you'll realise that when you see each other that it involves being in the bedroom. Now sometimes, that's okay if you do other things besides the obvious. However, if it is just that one thing and you never go out or do anything else then that may be a sign that it's just a bit of fun and nothing more. This does bring you down though as it makes you feel like they don't want to be seen with you in public with you and then your self-esteem just comes crashing down. The best thing to do is to just ask or suggest doing something other than sex. See what happens then. Another thing which can really be an obvious sign is that lovely time of the month. Your period. Now in my experience, I've discovered when this time of the month comes along that it's a great excuse for my date not to see me. The reason, they don't like blood. Now I get it because I couldn't feel any less turned on then when I'm on my period. However, they make it sound like during this time of the month that you're not a human being and you should avoid at all costs when really you are just the same as you are normally. You just can't have a little bedroom fun. I mean there are other things you can do like go out somewhere, watch a movie, eat food. Make the sufferer feel good during this rubbish time of the month. If your date makes the effort during this time of the month then that shows they care about you and don't just want your body. If they avoid you like the plague, then that's a sign they just want your body and don't care that you're suffering.  

5. The Little Things

Now I'm just going to come out and say it. I'm a hugger. I love hugs and cuddling. The problem is I don't get to experience it much as I don't have many people to hug. This is something I noticed during those between moments during the bedroom sessions. You know those moments where you just need a break or to catch your breath. Tell me what your partner does during these moments. Do they remain close to you, talk to you, cuddle you, take a nap with you or do they go to the bathroom, sit on the edge of the bed away from you and check their phone? Honestly, it's an awkward feeling where you're just lying in bed with nothing on and your partner decides to move away from you to check their phone. Like what are you meant to do during that moment? Check your phone even though nobody ever messages you? Go to the bathroom. I'm not being funny but if you're someone who does this then know that it's not nice. Literally you just had a moment of being close during your bedroom session then when you're taking a break then you just pull away as if you can't get away fast enough. It's like any sign of being close or intimate with your partner puts you right off and you have to distract yourself with your phone or going to the bathroom then your partner is just left awkwardly lying on the bed wondering what they should do next. Just know that partner is staring at the back of your head, wondering why you don't want to get close to them when a minute ago you were all over each other. It just doesn't make sense. It is the little things sometimes that do make you see whether things are going well or not. If they're a hugger and are interested in your personal life then things are going well, if they avoid you during those moments between sex then clearly things are not going well. Sometimes the little things do matter, and they make you see who the person you're dating is really like. 

Anyway, I hope this post was helpful. I was basing this on my own dating experience. Let me know if you have any dating pet peeves or if you can relate to any I've mentioned. I would love to hear them. 

Thank you for reading my blog and I'll be back soon with another post. 

See you then. 

Megan x 

*This is not a sponsored post* 

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