Do They Care About You?

This is a question that plays in our heads a lot about whether someone we care about actually cares about you too. It's difficult because sometimes people send-off mixed signals and it can leave you feeling even more confused. Whether it's a friend, lover, or family member. You never really know but I think I may have figured out a few things to take note of if you're having doubts. 

1. How often they get in touch?

Are you speaking daily, weekly, or monthly with this person? How often do you message each other or even call? Who is the one that initiates the conversation? If you're the one who is always making the effort to message them then that may be a small sign that you care more. It doesn't take much effort to message someone, let them know that you do care about them. Therefore, if a person isn't putting in that simple effort to message because they're always busy, then clearly they don't care. It takes two seconds to message so if they can't find those two seconds to message then, do they even care? Or better yet let you know that they are busy today and not going to be on their phone all the time just in case you wonder where they are. It's just the little signs of effort that make you realise how much someone really cares about you. No effort = they don't care. Plain and simple. 

2. They always want something from you

Perhaps they do message you and that feels great, but you start to notice they always want something from you. For example, it could be the person you're dating. Does the conversation tend to turn dirty whenever you message? Fair enough we all have needs but is it a constant and you never really end up talking about anything else. That should be a clear sign that the relationship is not a serious one. I recommend waiting for them to message you and try not to say anything that will essentially turn them on and see if they make it dirty. If they do, put them off by saying you're not in the mood then see how long it takes for them to stop messaging you. Sometimes they'll keep messaging (which shows that there's more to your relationship than sex) and sometimes they'll leave you on read (cause you're not going to fulfil their wants) in which case they are definitely not serious about you. However, friends and family can be just as bad too. Pay attention when someone messages you first and see if they want something from you. If starts becoming a pattern, then maybe that person is just using you. Although tread carefully and don't call them out. Just put less effort into the relationship and see if they notice a difference. If they do, then they care. If they don't then they don't care.

3. They don't celebrate your success

One obvious sign they don't care is they're not there to celebrate your success. Whether it's a graduation, birthday, getting hired etc. Do they congratulate you or want to go out and celebrate with you? If they aren't always there to celebrate your success no matter how big or small it is then, do they really care? If you're always making the effort to celebrate their success but when you have a success and they're nowhere to be found or even just make very little effort to celebrate it then that you should tell you that they don't really care at all whether you succeed or fail. It does suck when you realise this but at the end of the day if someone truly cares for you then they will celebrate your success no matter how big or small. 

4. They're not there during your failures

 Of course, everyone has failures in life. We all have days that suck. However, sometimes what gets us through these days is the people that care about us. If someone cares about you, they will be there for you not just through the ups but the downs as well. Even if it's just a simple check to see if you're ok then that's a sign someone cares about you. If they are literally nowhere to be found on days when you're feeling low, then that shows they don't care as much you care. Someone who cares will be there in your life through thick and thin. Even if you're acting differently then that person will notice and don't try to play it off like it's nothing. Be honest about you feel and that person will support you. The worse thing is when you tell someone you're feeling low, and they make no effort to support you. They may question you why but then make no attempt to try to make you feel any better. Trust me someone who cares will want to resolve your unhappiness. They will do something to make you feel just a little bit better. Even just showing that you're there for that person if they need them is a sign you care. If you completely ignore that person in their time of need then why are you in their life because you clearly don't care. It doesn't take much to put in the effort to show someone you care so what's your excuse?

5. You never spend time together

Finally, a big obvious sign about whether they care is how much you spend time together. I know a lot of factors come into this because work can get in the way and life can throw you a curveball in a second. However, trying to meet up, going over your schedules and seeing if there's a gap to meet up. If you're finding yourself spending less time with the person you care about, yet they always seem to have free time for other people. That's an obvious sign that they don't value your company if they're not willing to see you. Even with someone you're dating, is it always you going to their place, and they never come to your place? Is it always you who's arranging to meet up and never the other way around? Someone who cares about you will want to see you even if it's just for a coffee. If the person seems to find time to hang out with other people and you seem to be the last resort, then that is a sign they don't care about you because the same effort they're putting with other people is not the same effort they are making with you. They may say they miss you (or rather if you say they miss you then they say I know as their response then hello, they don't care about you because they can't even be bothered to tell you they miss you too.) Yes, that's happened to me, and it sucks. Either way if they don't seem to try to see you, even if it's just once a month then do they really care at all?

Now, I know this may seem sad to wonder whether someone cares about you but sometimes it's the little details that make you notice if someone truly cares. It doesn't take much to put in effort to make a relationship work so what is their excuse. I'd recommend taking a step back and seeing if they put in the effort with you that you've been putting in with them. You may be surprised at what you find. 

I hope this was helpful to anyone who feels like they have people in your life that don't care. Believe me though, you do have people who care about you in your life. Whether it's a family member, a friend, or a lover. Try not to overthink it too much and hold onto the people that do care. If your relationship with that person is meant to work, then it will and if it isn't then it will fizzle out naturally especially if you start to notice the little things. Either way, I hope this gave you a little reassurance and maybe even make you notice a few things. This is something I've noticed in my life and start to accept it. Just a reminder that messaging someone a simple hello can make someone's day. You never really know what someone is going through in their life. Perhaps there's a bigger thing going on in someone's life and that's why they are being quiet or closed off with you. Do make the effort to show you are there with someone and maybe they might just open up to you on what's going on or it will just make them happy to know they do have someone who cares? 

So, if you're reading this far down my post then message someone you maybe haven't spoken to in a while because life is too short to be petty over stupid things and a little effort goes a long way. Show someone you do care about them and maybe they might not just be reading a blog post about whether someone actually cares about them. Of course do look out for the little signs to see if your relationship is one sided but also don't forget to care about the people in your life too. A little effort goes a long way sometimes, all it takes is just one message. 

Anyway, that's all I have to say really. Thank you for reading my blog and I hope you found this post somewhat helpful. I'll be back again soon with another post. 

See you then. 

Megan x 

*This is not a sponsored post* 

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