Introvert And Proud

The big question I have for you is: Do you see yourself as an introvert or an extrovert?

I see myself as an introvert. 

For those of you who have no idea what I'm talking about. Google it. I'm kidding but with the internet what it is, finding out something you don't know is easy as pie. For example the age of an actor in a film or what is introvert and extrovert. Either way, if you'd rather keep reading my blog (thank you by the way) then I'll give you a very short explanation. Introverts get their energy from being alone, they need time by themselves. It doesn't mean they're shy and awkward, they just need a break from socialising or else they may go insane. An extrovert is the opposite. They get their energy from socializing and being surrounded by people. It doesn't mean they're big-headed and overconfident. It just means they thrive from being surrounded by people. Sometimes you can get a mix of the two like an extroverted introvert or an introverted extrovert who sees both sides appealing to them. Either way, I'm positive I'm an introvert and proud to be one. 

Growing up, I used to hope to have lots of friends, many boyfriends and always have something planned. Now I realise I have a very lack of friends. I have one best friend. I've never had a boyfriend, although I'm kind of dating someone (I say kind of because I don't know where it's going, somewhere positive I hope) and the only thing I have planned is work. As I mentioned in a previous post, all I do is work, eat, sleep, and repeat. Either way, I've adapted to the way my life is through acceptance. I've accepted the fact I don't have many friends and I've learned to deal with my loneliness. I spend more time with my mum and do pretty much everything with her whether it's going away together or eating meals plus she's someone I can talk to about anything. If some of you knew the weird conversations we have, I'm sworn to secrecy that nothing we talk about ever leaves the house or is spoken to anyone else. It's kind of weird that my mum is almost like my best friend because that's how close we are. We get along so well, that we never run out of things to talk about. Yes, we argue as a mother and daughter should but at the end of the day, we can always count on one another. Once upon a time when I was young and stupid, I thought it would have been weird to have such a bond with your mother but now I'm older and not any wiser, I realise it's not so bad to have someone you can rely on like your mum. I feel very lucky to have the mother I do because she means the world to me. As I'm writing this, my mother was actually on a night out and I woke up at 5am to realise she still wasn't home. This was very unusual, and I started to panic. I felt like the roles had been reversed where I was the worrying parent, and she was the rebel daughter going on nights out. Luckily thanks to a where are you text and my mother's guarantee to wake up early in the mornings no matter what told me she was at her boyfriend's place and thought she had texted me to let me know (she didn't by the way) which was a relief. 

Anyway, I kind of got off the subject at hand. Yes, I'm an introvert. I enjoy my alone time. Especially as I work in customer service, I need my alone time more than ever because there are only so many people pleasing you can do in a day before it slowly makes you go insane. One of the things I learned from being an independent introvert is going to the cinema by yourself. It may seem like the scariest thing in the world for whatever reason but honestly, you're just watching a movie, and nobody cares if you're alone. Once you do once, it will open a whole world of possibilities and movies you want to watch even when nobody else wants to watch them with you. Another thing I've been enjoying is going for food by yourself. What I mean is sitting in a restaurant by yourself. You may think it's a sad thing to do but like with the cinema, you're just hungry and want food. Also, nobody cares if you're eating alone, in fact, people are probably jealous that you're doing something that they wouldn't have the guts to do. Granted some places I eat are where you can order it yourself because my introverted self doesn't want to talk to people today. There are two places in my town where I can do this and it's honestly the best. As soon as you do it once, you'll be able to do it all the time. It's one of those things I've learned to adapt to being an introvert with a very low social life. 

I barely get notifications from people and learned that there is no point making so much effort with a person if they don't make an effort with you. There are only so many first one to message that you can do before you realise the other person never does the same to you. Heck even with dating. Yes, the fun side of it is great and everything but sometimes there are those little hints that make you question whether it will ever become anything more than just a bit of fun. So far, I haven't learned how to break the ice of that conversation so where do you see us going in the future, I'm always afraid of that answer. Maybe one day I'll overcome that because I'm not getting any younger and I'm tired of playing games. 

So yeah, I'm not sure what the point of this very rambly post about being an introvert is but I hope perhaps some of you can relate. We all have unique quirks that make us who we are. All introverts are different as are all extroverts. There's no set in stone way to be one or the other. You can even have a bit of both inside of you. Either way, let me know what you're leaning towards and the reason why you think that way because I would love to hear it. 

Thank you for reading my blog and I'll be back again soon with another post. 

See you then. 

Megan x 

*This is not a sponsored post* 

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