How To Be Single?

The single life is inevitable. I've been single for over a year and have been single for many years now that I consider myself to be an expert at it. It can be rough but also quite enlightening and especially when you discover how to enjoy life while being single then you may find it something you don't want to change anytime soon. I thought I'd share my tips on how to be single and still live a happy life. Let's get started. 

1. Learn to be independent

Something I learned back in my uni days was if I wanted to do something, I should just do it. No matter if I was with people or on my own. It was actually so fulfilling after feeling lonely and getting a bad case of FOMO. I decided to plan something to do on my own. That's when I took a trip to the Trafford Centre and not only that but I decided to also brave going to the cinema on my own. I couldn't quite believe I was doing it but I did and honestly it was the best decision because I discovered a love of going to the cinema on my own. Not having to share the popcorn. Not having to worry whether the people you were with actually liked the movie. It honestly boosted my confidence and I ended up going to the cinema several times on my own. It was amazing. Then I discovered eating on my own at a restaurant. It's not that sad if you have headphones in. I can quite happily listen to an audiobook or watch a show on my phone while I eat. You kind of forget the people around you who are probably jealous because you're having a nice time on your own and they're with people when they'd rather be on their own. Being independent is a great asset to being single because you soon learn that you don't need people to do things you enjoy. You can do them on your own. Something I would really love to do is book a solo getaway. That's my next step and I'm hopeful that I'll get to do it this summer. 

2. Stop comparing yourself to others

I know when you scroll through social media and it feels like everybody is either getting engaged, married or announcing their pregnancy and it may feel like you are falling behind in life. Truth is that you're not. You're going at your own pace and when the time is right, it will happen. Of course there is a possibility that it might not happen, especially with this day and age of online dating when everyone just wants something casual. It's important to not compare your life to other peoples. At the end of the day, you don't know what is going behind closed doors. They may seem happy and in love online but in reality it could be a very toxic situation or one of them is cheating on the other or there is constant arguments all the time and paranoia that the other is being unfaithful. In those moments you should count yourself lucky. I think we should all remember that social media is not reality, just because something looks perfect doesn't mean it is. We all post only the good photos online and a lot of the time it's posed. Plus add all the filters and face tuning, then you have to question whether it's real especially with AI technology getting better and better these days. I think we should focus more on what is really happening then on social media and most importantly don't compare your life to what you see on social media. It does more harm than good. You're doing your best and you're probably in a better situation than the so-called happy couple on social media so count yourself lucky. 

3. It's okay to try online dating

These days the easiest way to meet people is through online dating. I recently dipped my toes back into it and was quickly reminded why I gave it up. Sadly you're going to get the needy ones, the ones that only care about hooking up and the ones that don't really care. You will find a few gems in there but in my experience those ones tend to either not reply a lot or eventually do something that will be a red flag. It's hard these days to find someone decent but sometimes you have to lower your expectations but also keep your guard up because you can easily get hurt if you start letting your emotions confuse you. Just do whatever feels right for you and set boundaries early on. The ones who respect your boundaries are the good ones and the ones that want to push them, they're not worth it. 

4. If you have a crush, let them know

The worst thing is to have a crush on someone but make no effort to let them know. I had a crush on someone I dated for a short time two years ago and I always hoped he'd magically notice me again but I made no effort to actually get in touch with him. Now he's happy in a relationship and I feel like I lost my chance to ever make a go of it. Honestly, if you like someone then don't be afraid to tell them or at least put in the effort to make them notice you. Message them, have a conversation with them. Who knows? They might feel the same way but you'd never really know unless you try. Don't rely on the hopes they'll comment on your selfie or randomly message you out of the blue. Start a conversation with them. If they post something on social media, react to it and comment on it. You never know they could have been waiting for you to get in touch with them. I think we should be more open with our feelings rather than hide away. I feel like I missed a lot of opportunities by not making the first move. Maybe one day, I will be brave enough.

5. You will find the one

I know, this is a phrase single people hear all the time and it drives me insane. The point is, you will find the right one. You may have to kiss a few frogs along the way but your future partner is out there somewhere. You may need to try online dating or make the first move with your crush but it will be all worth it when you find the one. I feel like you will know it when it happens. I have yet to find one but I'm feeling hopeful. Maybe someday it will happen but if it doesn't then that's okay too. I will live with that. Maybe.

Anyway, thank you for taking the time to read my blog and I'll be back again soon with another post.

See you then. 

Megan x

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